David and Goliath

My roommate, blogmeister Brian, introduced me to a hilarious little gem last night, so I figure I'll share it with the world. Apparently, it been around for awhile. But if you've seen it, you probably haven't seen it for awhile, so it's time to reexperience the true story of David and Goliath. You'll be glad you did.

Can you believe it?! "Unofficial St. Patrick's Day" has almost arrived! Coming this Friday...
For those of you unaware, this celebration represents everything that's wonderful in the world, up to and including drinking at breakfast, going to class drunk, and passing out. Campus bars will open at 8am for the occasion. Unfortunately, I have two tests Friday, so I will not be able to join in the festivities until 1pm, but I plan to catch up quickly. I'm not sure what I'll do yet, but a keg race is an option. Two teams. 15 members each. 2, 15 gallon half-barrels. Traditionally, the team that empties the keg first wins, but I want to suggest a better ending. Perhaps a relay race of some sort. Or maybe intermediate tasks every hour. I don't know yet, but whatever happens, it had better be pretty sweet.

Any suggestions? (P.S. This means I want comments. Contribute to the conversation, people! I'm sick of hauling your dead weight. But even if you still don't comment, you mustn't worry. I love you all as if you were my own.)